Just follow the f*ckin instructions, they don't require a PhD people.
THINK of a number from 1 to 10
MULTIPLY that number by 9
If the number is a 2-digit number, ADD the digits together
Now SUBTRACT 5
DETERMINE which letter in the alphabet corresponds to the number you ended up with (example: 1=a, 2=b, 3=c,etc.)
THINK of a country that starts with that letter
REMEMBER the last letter of the name of that country
THINK of the name of an animal that starts with that letter
REMEMBER the last letter in the name of that animal
THINK of the name of a fruit that starts with that letter
Are you thinking of a Kangaroo in Denmark eating an Orange?
--
What, you consider me some uneducated, misinformed idiot? LOL!! Of course that's exactly what I got, but here's why...
Considering that the formula in the beginning always equates to 4, there are only 4 "D" countries, and two of them are quite obscure in my opinion, of course everyone is going to pick Denmark. Hamlet, Hans Christian Andersan, Vikings... Sorry Djibouti, and Dominican Republic, you've not yet reached pop culture status.
Secondly a "K" animal. Hmmm... Koala, Kudzu, Kitten (It doesn't specify adult animals), Kite, etc... Oh wait, of course, Kangaroo.
And that leavs us with a fruit that starts with "O". Hmmmmm... Olive, right. It's technically a fruit. The ripened ovaries and surrounding tissue of a flowering plant.
But honestly how many people out there consider the olive more of a vegetable then a fruit? That's because most of consider fruit synonymous with sweet. If it's not sweet it's not fruit. Sorry Mr. Tomato, and Mr. Okra, you're just not sweet enough to be elevated to the prestigious fruit status.
So ends the oh so "mystical" status of this stupid e-mail brain bender.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Devil went down to Georgia!
So I was stumbling around the internet this morning and I can across this Primus video of their rendition of The Devil Went down to Georgia.
I wanted to see what other creative versions there were of this song out there. I came across this one, albeit the video was stolen from the version above. Have a listen, I think it has one of the best retorts from Johnny I have ever heard.
Here's the Muppets version. I really think Animal should have been involved in this one, although I love the psychedelic look of the Devil during his solo.
I wanted to see what other creative versions there were of this song out there. I came across this one, albeit the video was stolen from the version above. Have a listen, I think it has one of the best retorts from Johnny I have ever heard.
Here's the Muppets version. I really think Animal should have been involved in this one, although I love the psychedelic look of the Devil during his solo.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Guide to Japanese tourists visiting America.
1. The yen is very strong against the dollar right now. This will make
goods in America seem very cheap -- an excellent opportunity for
shopping! However, remember to be polite in your use of money --
America is in the middle of economic malaise right now, and Japanese
people with wads of money in their hand might be looked on with envy.
Besides, if you are obviously wealthy in an American city, you may be
robbed.
2. For our valued customers who work in the automotive
industry [#1 employer where I live], we advise discretion. If you must
say where you work, the preferred phrasing is [English] "I work at the
car company".
3. Most Americans are very polite, particularly
outside of the big cities. However, outside of the big cities, everyone
owns guns. Inside the big cities, almost everyone owns guns. Let's be
polite together!
4. If you go shopping at an American department
store, they will ask you if you want to open a credit card account.
They are *not* asking whether you want to use a credit card. This may
seem strange but it is an American custom to offer customers a credit
card, in order to make them spend more money. We suggest politely
declining offers of credit cards. You may have to politely decline
several times. Don't think of this as rude, the Americans have to do it
too.
5. Most Americans think we look like Chinese or Koreans. Try not to be too offended.
6. Most Americans will think that a Japanese person standing on the street
is an American, unless they are holding a camera. If you are not
comfortable speaking English, you might try bringing along a camera to
say "I am a tourist, please don't expect me to speak English." Except,
don't try this in the big cities -- tourists get mugged in big cities.
7. Americans have a social institution called a "gratuity". Basically, the
price on the menu at any place which serves food is not the real price.
The real price is 20% higher. You have to calculate 20%, write it under
the subtotal, and sum to arrive at the real price. Taxis work the same
way. It is considered very rude not to pay the "gratuity".
8. In
general, Americans consider it impolite to discuss politics. However,
this January Obama will become the new president, and many people are
excited! If they ask you what you think of him, a safe answer is
[English] "Obama is really cool." or [English] "Obama speaks so well.
Not like me. Hehe." Be very careful when pronouncing his name. O BA MA,
just like Obama City.
9. Most
big cities have Japanese food available. You may have to look hard,
though -- ask your hotel for some place to eat tempura. Restaurants
which say they serve sushi probably only serve makizushi, like
California rolls. (Americans think California rolls are [English]
"sushi".) If a restaurant says [English] "Asian" they really mean
Chinese. They are probably not really Chinese, either.
10. Ladies:
if you shop for clothes, ask for where to find [English] "petite". It
means normal sized. Ladies who are petite may have difficulty finding
clothes which fit in America, except at specialty shops.
11. McDonalds: Has no teriyaki burger in America. Portions are bigger and
food is cheaper. Sometimes the person taking the order does not speak
English. Please relax! They probably understand the set menu, although
it is called [English] "combo", and you can hold up the number with
your hands as shown. [Snip of chart for how Americans count on their
fingers, which is actually different than how Japanese people count on
their fingers, hence the need for a chart.]
goods in America seem very cheap -- an excellent opportunity for
shopping! However, remember to be polite in your use of money --
America is in the middle of economic malaise right now, and Japanese
people with wads of money in their hand might be looked on with envy.
Besides, if you are obviously wealthy in an American city, you may be
robbed.
2. For our valued customers who work in the automotive
industry [#1 employer where I live], we advise discretion. If you must
say where you work, the preferred phrasing is [English] "I work at the
car company".
3. Most Americans are very polite, particularly
outside of the big cities. However, outside of the big cities, everyone
owns guns. Inside the big cities, almost everyone owns guns. Let's be
polite together!
4. If you go shopping at an American department
store, they will ask you if you want to open a credit card account.
They are *not* asking whether you want to use a credit card. This may
seem strange but it is an American custom to offer customers a credit
card, in order to make them spend more money. We suggest politely
declining offers of credit cards. You may have to politely decline
several times. Don't think of this as rude, the Americans have to do it
too.
5. Most Americans think we look like Chinese or Koreans. Try not to be too offended.
6. Most Americans will think that a Japanese person standing on the street
is an American, unless they are holding a camera. If you are not
comfortable speaking English, you might try bringing along a camera to
say "I am a tourist, please don't expect me to speak English." Except,
don't try this in the big cities -- tourists get mugged in big cities.
7. Americans have a social institution called a "gratuity". Basically, the
price on the menu at any place which serves food is not the real price.
The real price is 20% higher. You have to calculate 20%, write it under
the subtotal, and sum to arrive at the real price. Taxis work the same
way. It is considered very rude not to pay the "gratuity".
8. In
general, Americans consider it impolite to discuss politics. However,
this January Obama will become the new president, and many people are
excited! If they ask you what you think of him, a safe answer is
[English] "Obama is really cool." or [English] "Obama speaks so well.
Not like me. Hehe." Be very careful when pronouncing his name. O BA MA,
just like Obama City.
9. Most
big cities have Japanese food available. You may have to look hard,
though -- ask your hotel for some place to eat tempura. Restaurants
which say they serve sushi probably only serve makizushi, like
California rolls. (Americans think California rolls are [English]
"sushi".) If a restaurant says [English] "Asian" they really mean
Chinese. They are probably not really Chinese, either.
10. Ladies:
if you shop for clothes, ask for where to find [English] "petite". It
means normal sized. Ladies who are petite may have difficulty finding
clothes which fit in America, except at specialty shops.
11. McDonalds: Has no teriyaki burger in America. Portions are bigger and
food is cheaper. Sometimes the person taking the order does not speak
English. Please relax! They probably understand the set menu, although
it is called [English] "combo", and you can hold up the number with
your hands as shown. [Snip of chart for how Americans count on their
fingers, which is actually different than how Japanese people count on
their fingers, hence the need for a chart.]
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Rhonda Byrne’s "The Secret" debunked.
This snippit is taken from The Skeptoids latest questions podcast when asked about quantum physics.
--
When Rhonda Byrne wrote The Secret and claimed that quantum physics explains how you can wish for things and they'll magically appear, she didn't know anything more about quantum physics than the average person on the street. She's just a smart enough marketer to know that when people hear the term, they're impressed. Ask a theoretical physicist who has read her chapter on quantum theory: Not a single word of it makes any sense; it's just childish technobabble to impress the masses. Real quantum theory has no conceivable relevance to paranormal claims like The Secret or What the Bleep Do We Know, thus its frequent employ is almost always without any scientific meaning.
--
When Rhonda Byrne wrote The Secret and claimed that quantum physics explains how you can wish for things and they'll magically appear, she didn't know anything more about quantum physics than the average person on the street. She's just a smart enough marketer to know that when people hear the term, they're impressed. Ask a theoretical physicist who has read her chapter on quantum theory: Not a single word of it makes any sense; it's just childish technobabble to impress the masses. Real quantum theory has no conceivable relevance to paranormal claims like The Secret or What the Bleep Do We Know, thus its frequent employ is almost always without any scientific meaning.
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