Second Fiddle

When I was in grade school, I played saxophone in the band. The biggest or at least most fun competition of my life was probably between Jim Gleen and I over first chair Sax. I was actually a pretty good sax player back then although now I’ve grown a bit fonder of the clarinet. But that’s for another story.

We competed in every facet of the game. If he got a new saxophone, I got a new saxophone. If I practiced 2 extra hours, he’d practice 2 extra hours. We even went as far as talking shit about each other to the rest of the band. The thing got pretty heated and some might say, out of hand.

Eventually, the director chose Jim over me for first chair. In true grade-school fashion I quit the band. There’s no way I’d settle for second chair. I’ve always wondered how great it would have felt if they’d have groveled to get me back because something had happened to Jim. Alas it never happened and I never got my secret glory.

In the years since then I have grown up a bit and learned a few lessons. One of those being not to be so arrogant. But I never lost my steadfast belief that second chair would never be good enough for me. I think this general rule holds true for most aspects of your life. Never settle for second best. Always strive to be the best that you can be.

One of those experiences in life where I believe this rule holds the most truth is with the opposite sex. When a guy chases a girl and she snubs him off by being with someone else that typically means that the girl isn’t interested. At least to me that means, "I just want to be friends." My parents taught me to respect women thus no means no.

That also means; once she’s realized that she made a mistake and she sees that the guy has a new girlfriend, she has no right to blame the guy for anything or interfere in what he has! I don’t play second chair... EVER... you had your chance and you blew it.

Always remember, we live in the age of technology. The burden of the chase is no longer entirely on the shoulders of the man. So next time you notice someone who you think might like you, don’t play games. Speak up with something other then, "I just want to be friends." Cause, who knows what would happen if YOU offered that guy first chair in your band.